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24-Nov-2019 21:01

Scripture calls Christians to “flee” from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians ), not to “see how difficult we can make the temptation and still prevail” or to “see how close to the line we can get without sinning.” In my view, Scripture teaches clearly that there is to be romantic physical intimacy outside of marriage.No reasonable person would argue that physical temptation does not increase — a lot — the longer two people date who are attracted to each other and who grow to love each other.I’ve spoken to numerous “long-dating” couples, in college and beyond, who other than living together, could do little to intertwine their lives any more than they already are.They see each other every day, are with each other’s families every holiday (and often know their partner’s family as well as any son or daughter-in-law does), they travel together, spend most of their non-working (or studying) time together, they daily confide in one another (and maybe one another), and are without doubt, closer emotionally with one another than with anyone else on the planet.Where a relationship is shorter, accountability stronger, and the level of temptation, and the likelihood of sin, goes down.To put it simply, “not acting married before you’re married,” gets exponentially more difficult the longer a pre-marital relationship persists.I discuss this principle more fully in “Principles for Drawing Boundaries” and “What Does a Biblical Relationship Look Like?

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It’s still really easy to “act married” emotionally, even in a long-distance relationship.

In the meantime, the “we’re already committed” rationalization tends to make couples feel free to act in all sorts of ways they didn’t before, and every argument I’ve made in this series applies ), but that doesn’t mean that anyone who uses that language is automatically correct. Scott now lives in the Louisville, Ky., area with his wife, Rachel, and son, William, where he works as an attorney and serves as an elder of Third Avenue Baptist Church.

As a quick theological aside on guidance, God does not primarily lead His people by mystic feelings in the pits of our stomachs about what He wants us to do.

Let me try to deal very briefly with the most popular responses I get to this argument — especially from college students.

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I think it does, even if the physical circumstances are different.PART 6: Growing in Intimacy » In matters of dating or courtship, I generally recommend that people either get married or break up within a year or so of beginning a dating relationship.